Sick Days
Took the day off work today because I'm still feeling sick. It was a nice, sunny day out which made it suck twice as much to be home. Sick days off work should be spent on the golf course, not actually being sick I've got some sort of flu, and no one to bring me some chicken soup.
While I was home today I watched "Reservoir Dogs". My favorite part of the movie is when Mr. Pink (Steve Buscemi) gives his reasons for not tipping.`
Nice Guy Eddie:
Ok, everybody cough up green for the little lady.
Everybody whips out a buck and throws it on the table.
Everybody, that is, except Mr. Pink.
Nice Guy Eddie:
C'mon throw in a buck.
Mr. Pink:
Uh-huh, I don't tip.
Nice Guy Eddie:
Whaddaya mean you don't tip?
Mr. Pink:
I don't believe in it.
Nice Guy Eddie:
You don't believe in tipping?
Mr White: (Laughing)
I love this kid, he's a madman, this guy.
Mr. Blonde:
Do you have any idea what these ladies make? They make shit.
Mr. Pink:
Don't give me that. She don't make enough money, she can quit.
(Everybody Laughs)
Nice Guy Eddie:
I don't even know a Jew who'd have the balls to say that. So let's get this straight. You never tip?
Mr. Pink:
I don't tip because society says I gotta. I tip when somebody deserves a tip. When somebody really puts forth an effort, they deserve a little something extra. But this tipping automatically, that shit's for the birds. As far as I'm concerned, they're just doin' their job.
Mr Blue:
Our girl was nice.
Mr. Pink:
Our girl was okay. She didn't do anything special.
Mr. Blonde:
What's something special, take ya in the kitchen and suck your dick?
(They All Laugh)
Nice Guy Eddie:
I'd go over twelve percent for that.
Mr. Pink:
Look, I ordered coffee. Now we've been here a long fuckin' time, and she's only filled my cup three times. When I order coffee, I want it filled six times.
Mr Blonde:
What if she's too busy?
Mr. Pink:
The words "too busy" shouldn't be in a waitress's vocabulary.
Nice Guy Eddie:
Excuse me, Mr. White, but the last thing you need is another cup of coffee.
(They All Laugh)
Mr. Pink:
These ladies aren't starvin' to death. They make minimum wage. When I worked for minimum wage, I wasn't lucky enough to have a job that society deemed tipworthy.
Nice Guy Eddie:
Ahh, now we're getting down to it. It's not that he's a cheap bastard--
Mr. Orange:
It is that too--- --
Nice Guy Eddie:
It is that too. He couldn't get a waiter job. You talk like a pissed-off dishwasher:
"Fuck those cunts and their fuckin' tips".
Mr. Blonde:
So you don't care that they're counting on your tip to live?
(Mr. Pink rubs two of his fingers together)
Mr. Pink:
You know what this is? It's the world's smallest violin, playing just for the waitressess.
Mr Blonde:
You don't have any idea what you're talking about. These people bust their asses, it's a hard job.
Mr. Pink:
So's working at McDonald's, but you don't feel the need to tip them.They're serving you food, you should tip 'em. But no, society says tip these guys over here, but not those guys over there. That's bullshit.
Mr. Orange:
They work harder that the kids at McDonald's.
Mr. Pink:
Oh yeah, I don't see them cleaning fryers.
Mr. Brown:
These people are taxed on the tips they make. When you stiff 'em, you cost them money.
Mr Blonde:
Waitressing is the number one occupation for female non-college graduates in this country. It's the one job basically any woman can get, and make a living on. The reason is because of the tips.
Mr. Pink:
Fuck all that
(They All Laugh)
Mr. Pink:
Hey, I'm very sorry that the government taxes their tips. That's fucked up. But that ain't my fault. It would appear that the waitresses are one of the many groups the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. Show me a paper that says the government shouldn't do that, I'll sign it.Put it to a vote, I'll vote for it. But what I won't do is play ball. And this non-college bullshit you're telling me, I've got two words for that: "Learn to fuckin' type." 'Cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent, you're in for a big fucking' suprise.
Mr. Orange:
He convinced me. Give me my dollar back.
Almost enough to make me ask for my dollar back too.
See you when I see you.
Baron
While I was home today I watched "Reservoir Dogs". My favorite part of the movie is when Mr. Pink (Steve Buscemi) gives his reasons for not tipping.`
Nice Guy Eddie:
Ok, everybody cough up green for the little lady.
Everybody whips out a buck and throws it on the table.
Everybody, that is, except Mr. Pink.
Nice Guy Eddie:
C'mon throw in a buck.
Mr. Pink:
Uh-huh, I don't tip.
Nice Guy Eddie:
Whaddaya mean you don't tip?
Mr. Pink:
I don't believe in it.
Nice Guy Eddie:
You don't believe in tipping?
Mr White: (Laughing)
I love this kid, he's a madman, this guy.
Mr. Blonde:
Do you have any idea what these ladies make? They make shit.
Mr. Pink:
Don't give me that. She don't make enough money, she can quit.
(Everybody Laughs)
Nice Guy Eddie:
I don't even know a Jew who'd have the balls to say that. So let's get this straight. You never tip?
Mr. Pink:
I don't tip because society says I gotta. I tip when somebody deserves a tip. When somebody really puts forth an effort, they deserve a little something extra. But this tipping automatically, that shit's for the birds. As far as I'm concerned, they're just doin' their job.
Mr Blue:
Our girl was nice.
Mr. Pink:
Our girl was okay. She didn't do anything special.
Mr. Blonde:
What's something special, take ya in the kitchen and suck your dick?
(They All Laugh)
Nice Guy Eddie:
I'd go over twelve percent for that.
Mr. Pink:
Look, I ordered coffee. Now we've been here a long fuckin' time, and she's only filled my cup three times. When I order coffee, I want it filled six times.
Mr Blonde:
What if she's too busy?
Mr. Pink:
The words "too busy" shouldn't be in a waitress's vocabulary.
Nice Guy Eddie:
Excuse me, Mr. White, but the last thing you need is another cup of coffee.
(They All Laugh)
Mr. Pink:
These ladies aren't starvin' to death. They make minimum wage. When I worked for minimum wage, I wasn't lucky enough to have a job that society deemed tipworthy.
Nice Guy Eddie:
Ahh, now we're getting down to it. It's not that he's a cheap bastard--
Mr. Orange:
It is that too--- --
Nice Guy Eddie:
It is that too. He couldn't get a waiter job. You talk like a pissed-off dishwasher:
"Fuck those cunts and their fuckin' tips".
Mr. Blonde:
So you don't care that they're counting on your tip to live?
(Mr. Pink rubs two of his fingers together)
Mr. Pink:
You know what this is? It's the world's smallest violin, playing just for the waitressess.
Mr Blonde:
You don't have any idea what you're talking about. These people bust their asses, it's a hard job.
Mr. Pink:
So's working at McDonald's, but you don't feel the need to tip them.They're serving you food, you should tip 'em. But no, society says tip these guys over here, but not those guys over there. That's bullshit.
Mr. Orange:
They work harder that the kids at McDonald's.
Mr. Pink:
Oh yeah, I don't see them cleaning fryers.
Mr. Brown:
These people are taxed on the tips they make. When you stiff 'em, you cost them money.
Mr Blonde:
Waitressing is the number one occupation for female non-college graduates in this country. It's the one job basically any woman can get, and make a living on. The reason is because of the tips.
Mr. Pink:
Fuck all that
(They All Laugh)
Mr. Pink:
Hey, I'm very sorry that the government taxes their tips. That's fucked up. But that ain't my fault. It would appear that the waitresses are one of the many groups the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. Show me a paper that says the government shouldn't do that, I'll sign it.Put it to a vote, I'll vote for it. But what I won't do is play ball. And this non-college bullshit you're telling me, I've got two words for that: "Learn to fuckin' type." 'Cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent, you're in for a big fucking' suprise.
Mr. Orange:
He convinced me. Give me my dollar back.
Almost enough to make me ask for my dollar back too.
See you when I see you.
Baron
posted by terrydavies | 10:56 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home